It’s normal to be affected by difficult situations

Ishbel Straker is a Consultant Psychiatric Nurse and one of her passions is the mental well-being within ministry. She has been working with Elim developing this provision for nearly three years and it continues to grow

Ishbel is the Founder and CEO of I Straker
Consultants, a mental health service

I said goodbye to a patient last week. It was a nice occasion. I had walked with him through some extremely difficult emotions and had the privilege of seeing him come through the other side. As I reflected on this journey, I considered what had been the most difficult part from my perspective and I concluded it was the exposure of the trauma.

You may be reading this thinking that surely when a person comes to see me the trauma is already exposed, hence the reason they are attending – but that’s not the case. Very often, I will see someone who says they just don’t feel like themselves or they really aren’t coping well, and I have to be the bearer of bad news and explain that they have experienced trauma and are now dealing with the impact of this.

This is not a simple conversation, as you can imagine, because if someone doesn’t recognise they are traumatised they generally don’t even acknowledge what could be traumatic. So we go on to discuss what this may be and then onto acceptance that it has had an impact.

This can take a significant amount of time, and part of the difficulty I have is encouraging people to accept that they too can be impacted by difficult situations.

Yes, you heard it correctly; you can, could, and may well have been impacted by a difficult situation within your role. Shock, horror! I can feel you at this moment sitting in disbelief – that can’t be the case, nor should it be, because you, as a minister, should be built differently.

However, I am here to tell you differently – and the reason I am telling you this is not to ruin your morning cuppa but to enable you to consider why you might be feeling a little impacted recently, and to help you safeguard yourself against impact in the future. There is nothing better than a preventative measure, so if you are able to say right now that this doesn’t apply to you then that’s fabulous, but the hard work should begin.

Look after yourself, recognise your limitations and protect yourself against becoming susceptible to burnout – this will give you some protection against what the ministry may throw your way.

As I said my goodbye to this extremely seasoned minister, I parted by telling him that his difficulties would form a legacy that would support and enable those around him to be better equipped to deal with difficulties and professional trauma. He was tearfully grateful as he said at least some good would come out of his hardship.

So, once again I encourage you to consider his story, and think about the changes you can make to help you prevent similar experiences in your life.

This article first appeared in Direction Magazine. For further details, please click here.

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